The Heart of Anger

I appreciate blogs like Buried Treasure that don't hide the fact that neither our children nor us are perfect.

In that spirit, I've mentioned before the struggles we have with sinful anger in our children and our parenting. Kristin and I recently read the only book on this subject I know of, The Heart of Anger, by Lou Priolo.

I was initially skeptical of the book, since most of the Christian "How-To" books seem to forget the gospel. They make you think that if you do these 7 things then your marriage will be better, your job more satisfying, etc. They almost all fail to mention the essential role of the Holy Spirit in sanctifying us, and also the means He primarily uses (the preaching of the Word, the Sacraments, and prayer).

However, this book was good, it avoided those errors more than most. As far as addressing how to avoid sinful anger, I found it helpful. For instance, it pointed out from Proverbs a couple dozen ways that parents can provoke their children to anger.

I also thought the author did well to address the parent's crucial task of ensuring that positive behavior replaces poor behavior. He says, "biblical discipline involves correcting wrong behavior by practicing right behavior, with the right attitude, for the right reason, until the right behavior becomes habitual". For example, when my son says something mean to his sister, he should not only apologize, but also restate his remark to her appropriately (words, tone, and non-verbal communication).

Lastly, I found the book similar in tone and theological perspective to Shepherding a Child's Heart.