The Blind Side

When WORLD magazine ran a cover story on the movie The Blind Side, which tells the story of a very shy, large, and homeless boy from the projects and his adoption by an upper class family in Memphis, Kristin and I were itching to see it. Thanks to visiting grandparents last night we were able to.

After reading WORLD's gushing review our expectations for the movie were so high I was concerned it would turn out to be a let down. In terms of some of the casting choices, dialog, and basic acting skills I doubt it will be a contender for an Academy Award. Yet the story in this movie is indeed a rare jewel. The fact that the story is true gives it power. The scenes from the projects and the contrast with affluent Southern culture is accurately done.

But what sets this movie apart from other true stories is that the love this family showed to one orphaned child could also be shown by you and me, right where we are at, right now. The end result would certainly be different than this movie's ending, but it need not be any less glorious in God's eyes. The reality of poverty and children in desperate need in our own backyard is undeniable. This movie reveals the joy of sharing with those in need and how it transforms both the giver and the receiver.

I hope you'll see it. Its effect on your heart and mind will last long after the credits roll.

Overheard

On a long flight recently I had the window seat and two ladies had the middle and aisle seats. They didn't know each other but quickly struck up a conversation that turned surprisingly personal and to me, as a captive of the conversation, painful.

One lady was middle-aged and the other was nearing 70, as I recall her saying. The subject of their conversation turned to their children and then, surprisingly, it turned to their abortions--they had both had at least one. To my dismay here is what was said by the younger lady:

"I have no problems with the abortion. No nightmares, nothing. But the child I gave away that bothers me. Someday I'm going to look him up on Facebook or something. But the abortion didn't bother me at all. I've got to be happy!"

A sad statement about the brokenness and hard-heartedness that selfishness brings.

Sons and Daughters

I highly recommend this album. It is a musically enjoyable and theologically delightful tool to remind yourself of God’s adopting grace. It will put a song in your heart to remind you of what God has done in Christ--while none of us were naturally God's children, God, in his grace has made us his own sons and daughters through the death of his beloved Son.

I have several Sovereign Grace albums and this one is right up there withValley of Vision and Savior.

We have room: Adoption Documentary

Promo for "We Have Room" Documentary from David Watson on Vimeo.

HT: the Abba fund blog

The one-day pregnancy, two years later

What a cake!

Two years ago on this day we were finishing our homestudy and hoping to adopt sometime before we moved. The day after we completed the basic paperwork we received a call and were matched to Zeke. He was born on April 4th and we were soon in route to pick him up.

That "one-day pregnancy" is an amazing adoption story, but one with sad implications of how great the need is to adopt minorities domestically.

We can't imagine life without Zeke now and wouldn't want to. Happy birthday, Caboose!

Let's pray

"How long has it been since you prayed for this sin [abortion] to be removed?"
-Pastor Randy Steele, from a sermon given on Sanctity of Life Sunday, 2009

Some specific prayer points:
Pray that the incoming President will reconsider his views on this moral issue

Pray that the Freedom of Choice Act will not be signed, or if it is that it will not be as effective at wiping out restrictions on abortion as feared.

Pray for the work of CareNet and others like them to influence more pregnancies to result in life and not in death

Pray that many more Christian families would be willing to adopt

More friends adopting

We're excited for the Nielsens (a family from Grace and Isaiah's school) that leave tomorrow to pick up their new daughter. Also, we learned today of another family from the same school that has been matched and leaves this week to pick up a new son. These are both Christian families, meaning we have some new kingdom kids. Both families are adopting from the same agency in Alabama that placed Faith and Zeke with us. There's a great need for more families to open their homes to these little homeless ones.

In distress

AP/Jerome Delay
Protegee, carrying her sibling on her back, cries as she looks for her parents through the village of Kiwanja, north of Goma, eastern Congo on Thursday Nov. 6. A fragile cease-fire in Congo appeared to be unraveling Thursday as the U.N. said battles between warlord Laurent Nkunda’s rebels and the army spread to another town in the volatile country’s east.


"Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their distress, and to keep oneself unstained by the world."
James 1:27

Pray that Christians may do their little bit towards widows and orphans and call others to do their little bit until it is enough.

HT: Amy

Good news to go

All the audio from the conference I attended recently on our Adoption in Christ and what it means for orphans is now available for free download.

I especially recommend these two messages:

Rick Phillips - “The Good News of Adoption“

Carl Robbins - “Adoption and the Multi-Ethnic Family of God“

A day-long dose of good news

I'm in South Carolina to consume vast quantities of pork BBQ (vinegar-based!) and other delectables that only Southerners really know how to make. I also came to see my mother and brother (and his wife) and, quite coincidentally, to attend the Together for Adoption Conference today in Greenville.

The "Together" refers in part to the conference speakers from various denominational backgrounds. Forgive me for bragging on my own "team" a little but the Presbyterian preachers (Rick Phillips and Carl Robbins) represented in force! I wish I could have heard these messages back when Kristin and I were first considering adoption--they were very stirring and biblically-insightful. I'll put up a link to them next week when they're on-line, but for now here are a few choice quotes.

"When you hear the word adoption, do your thoughts move to the horizontal (families adopting children) or do they move vertically (God adopting us)?"
Dan Cruver

[note: test question for whether our thoughts are biblically-calibrated]

"'Relationship with God' talk doesn't have much content to it unless you know what we've been saved to"
Rick Phillips

[note: while we may have a strong sense of what we're saved from we suffer from not appreciating what Adoption has saved us to]

"Our manner of adopting: we want white, blond-headed, perfect babies. But God adopted those who were his enemies and had no merits."
Rick Phillips

"The most potent form of evangelism and discipleship is adoption."
Rick Phillips

"Any denial of our togetherness with Christians of other races on the horizontal plane is a denial of Adoption on the vertical plane! And is working against Christ!"
Carl Robbins

"God adopts transracially; He has crossed the boundaries"[...so should we].
Carl Robbins

"The 'end' of our Adoption [in Christ] is not horizontal adoption but the ultimate goal is for earth to become like heaven. God uses us for this purpose."
Tullian Tchividjian

"God is not in the process of giving it [the world] all up but gaining it all back. Christians should engage the world and solve the orphan care problem."
Tullian Tchividjian

There was also a great group of exhibitors representing foster care and adoption ministries. I visited every table and will bring some materials to church with me for those that would like to see them.

Doing their part

This video was on ESPN Gameday about Georgia head coach Mark Richt and his family. It focuses on two children that they adopted from Ukraine, including one that has a facial deformity.

HT: Z

I'm going (November 1st)

I got my ticket right here.

Moore: what adoption teaches about Adoption

Loving adopted children

What a joy it has been to study the way God has saved us through adoption into his family (Gal 4:1-7, Rom 8:15-17). C.J. Mahaney was right in his recent message on adoption that meditating on this truth of Scripture will lead to assurance of God's love, peace of conscience, joy in the Holy Spirit, and I believe, increase of grace.

All Christians doubt, at times, whether it's possible that the Father really loves us as much as he loves his only begotten Son, Jesus. Could he love his adopted children as much as he does his only begotten Son?

My experience as a father of adopted and biological children is that there is no difference in the love I have for them. Whether through adoption or birth, they are all part of my family, and being in the family is what counts.

If you are in the family of God, you are loved as much as Jesus himself is loved by the Father. Believe it! Rejoice in it!

Googling got me

Here's a google search that took me by surprise tonight and moved me to tears (just a little, of course). Type in "Gotcha Day adoption" and click on images. ("Gotcha Day" is adoption lingo for "the day we got you.")

You'll see page after page of great photos of beaming parents and orphans finding homes. We love gotcha day stories! Here's a few great pictures.

A design for your happiness

I've known too many sincere Christians that have been less than convinced that God really loved them. They thought, well he tolerates me, or he is always frustrated with me, and they've never been able to rest in the Father’s abiding, deep love for them.

Yet redemption starts with God’s nature, his absolute and unquenchable love for his people. God made us for this very reason—so that in Christ we can be his beloved children.

The study we are going through in Sunday School has been helpful and thanks to Google documents I can at least share the slides with you.


Sources cited (besides Peterson's book): Heirs with Christ (Beeke), Communion with the Triune God (Owen), Communion with God (Kapic)

What were we thinking?!?

There's a lot of talk in the blogosphere right now on transracial adoption (see my side bar "Briefly Noted"). A new study just came out that apparently warns against it. Many secular social workers have thought this way for a long time. And regrettably, many church people do as well. Russell Moore presents what has been for us the compelling reasons to adopt transracially.

What were we thinking when we did this?
1. "Right now, there are untold numbers of children, many of them racial minorities, languishing in the foster care system in the United States. Would the social workers really have us believe that it is better for an African-American child to grow up bounced from home to home in this bureaucratic limbo than to be a child to parents whose skin is paler than his?"

2. "But there's an even bigger issue here: the gospel of Jesus Christ. The gospel drives us away from our identity in the flesh, and toward a new identity, indeed a new family, defined by the Spirit."

This is what we were thinking. We wanted more children. The doctors said it was unwise for Kristin (a diabetic) to give birth to more children. We knew that many children here in the States need loving homes where they'll hear about Christ. We came to learn that there are 5 times as many adoptable, minority children as there are white children. Our hearts were moved at the realization of this need. And so our need (more children) and the children's need (a loving home) came together in God's providence.

The Father's adopted love for a prodigal like me

The Wrestling Mat is intended to be, primarily, a place to document the wrestling I do with the gospel in order to get a better grip on it. Sometimes I stray from that theme, but I want, very much, to grasp with ever deepening understanding and affection the gospel as it is pictured in precious doctrines like adoption, the Cross of Christ, etc. Here's something I heard Lig Duncan say during a discussion (panel 5 about 15 minutes in) at Together for the Gospel that strengthens my hold in both those areas:

Jesus is on the cross because of the Father's love. Spurgeon says when you look at the Cross you have to ask the question, 'Does the Father love me, more than He loves His own Son?' Look at John 3:16--we often talk about the love of Jesus here and I don't want to diminish that--but see how it speaks to the prior love of the Father that he gave up the most precious thing in the universe for us. And Romans 8:32 says he spared not his only Son for us! The cross is the instrument and expression of the Father's love while at the same time addressing the Father's righteous wrath and indignation against our sin against Him. (a loose quote as I transcribed the audio)

God delivers Marie

Today we met a very special little girl. Marie was just adopted by a Christian couple we spoke with about transracial adoption a few months ago. I posted on that first discussion here.

I rejoice at how God saved Marie from abortion (her birthmom aborted 3 of Marie's older siblings and is still enslaved to a self-destructive lifestyle). What a joy it was to hold this little one today and marvel at how God had plucked her out of this situation and placed her in a loving, Christ-exalting home. I'm especially thankful to have played a minor part in God bringing this about.

Praise the Father of the fatherless who settles the solitary in a home!

Until it is enough

Family Life is doing a series of broadcasts on adoption (it's National Adoption Month). They recently interviewed a number of individuals who have been involved in orphan care ministry in their local churches. You’ll find this video very moving and challenging. We hope to do our little bit towards orphan care and call others to do their little bit until it is enough.



HT: Carolina Hope