Parenting the Poles

Our children are basically perfect. This is what the grandparents say when they spend time with one child at a time. But when the Bailey children are grouped together, watch out! Their behavior swings violently between two poles; they're either cruel to each other, or annoyingly goofy with each other.

In any given day our children fall off both sides of this horse many times. This afternoon I explained this observation to my oldest child (7); based on his response I think he may have got it, "This is what you mean by "self-control?" Right!

Maturity is at least knowing how to stay out of both the meanness and silliness ditches. My children are slowly learning this; as am I. I'm better with self-control now than I was as a new parent. I was better then than I was in college, and so on.

Naturally, children have childish behavior, which is often unpleasant. The difficulty for the parent is to patiently teach the children how to keep out of the ditches they keep falling into.