Childless by Choice
One of the things that strikes me as odd about this assignment is the number of married couples I've met without children. Of course to them I'm the odd one for having 4 children (I'm often asked if I'm Mormon), but it's getting to the point where it's unusual to meet a married couple in their thirties that have children.
In some cases the couples desire children but are infertile. But in many cases there is a conscious decision never to have children because it would interfere with their career plans. I can understand this selfishness among the non-Christian couples, but it's discouraging to find a similar attitude in believers.
I think the problem, once again, is a small Gospel. It's a lack of understanding of what we are saved unto. "Be fruitful and multiply" was never repealed. While the dominion mandate means more than raising Christian children, it does mean at least that.
The second problem is that American evangelicals find too much pleasure in ease. We are addicted to comfort and selfishness. Children are too much work. "Where there are no oxen, the manger is clean" you know (Prov 14:4).
1 comment:
Thanks, Monica for the note--it helps me to hear different perspectives.
I try to keep my blog posts brief, which means I don't say everything that can be said.
I'll add a little more to the original thought:
1. God's commands are blessings--this includes "be fruitful and multiply". But I understand that historically the Church has interpreted that command as meaning more than raising Godly children. So there are other ways of joyfully obeying God in this area.
2. There are clear examples in Scripture of Godly individuals who did not have children (e.g. Paul). But their choice was not based on a financial impact--rather it was to pour themselves out for His children through other means.
3. Regarding a feeling of being unsuited towards motherhood. It has been our experience that God does not prepare one for parenthood ahead of time. Rather it is through the difficulty of parenting that He brings maturity.
I don't want to obscure the main point of my post. My concern is that too many Christian couples have not been taught that a prime purpose for marriage is to raise Godly children. This is a missed blessing.
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