Monday, October 25, 2004

Peace at Any Price

I was talking last night to my wife about the gnawing feeling in my gut at the end of most days that I've been too harsh with my oldest son. I regret that most days I spend too much time either lecturing or discplining him. Kristin correctly pointed out the need for some one-on-one fun time. We're trying out a local chapter of the Christian Service Brigade, where fathers and sons get together once a week and do guy stuff together. Last time we made a marshmallow shooter. Next time we'll go hiking.

But I want to avoid falling into the "peace at any price" trap. In order to reduce the friction between us, it's tempting to negotiate the discipline standard with Eli. But that would be Esau's mistake, trading eternal joy for only a moment of satisfaction.

Rather like the Cat in the Hat who thinks he can bounce on the ball while balancing books, a rake, a boat, a cake, and a cranky fish, it's hard to hold up the rules of my house all day without bouncing off the walls. Often I become too lenient or a tyrant. Thanks be to God for forgiveness and a promise to work in me what is pleasing to Him.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Well said, Tim. I hope you know that you are not alone in feeling this way. I seldom feel as if I am balanced in my administration of discipline. I desperately want to show Christ to my boys through the way that I handle their sin, but I fall so short of this.

Charles R.

Unknown said...

I have 4 & a half children. My oldest is a 14 year old son. He has the "priviledge" of breaking new ground everyday. I'm saving for college for the others but for him we've opened a Roth IRA for professional therapy.